Thomas Edison once said, “If we did all the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astonish ourselves.”

So why is it so hard sometimes to take that leap of faith and just do it?

Well, I’ve come to understand that as a human being, both my mind and body are incredibly adept at keeping everything in balance in accordance with my beliefs.

In fact, stress is a key signal to the body that something is off.

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“Both Eastern and Western medical sciences have long understood that maintaining natural balances is the body’s greatest priority; if the systems of the body are going to work at all, they must work together in harmony. When equilibrium is thrown off balance, the result is stress…Stress includes both the alarm responses that signal imbalance and the coping mechanisms that seek restoration of equilibrium.”

(Gerald May, Addiction & Grace - Love and Spirituality in the Healing of Addictions, p. 73)

And haven’t we all experienced stress, along with that drive to get things back to “normal?”

Last month I had a (somewhat) funny situation happen to me. I was sitting at my desk working on something when I heard a little noise by my window. I looked up and there sitting on the sill, staring right at me through the blinds was a little mouse. And yes, it was inside.

Our eyes locked for probably a minute or more. I didn’t want to move for fear it would leave the sill and come all the way into my bedroom. But as you might suspect, it eventually scampered all the way in.

Years ago I had a problem with a mouse in a previous home. All those memories came flooding back into my brain: the endless scratching noises that would keep me up at night, holes and droppings discovered throughout the house, buying and setting traps everywhere…all of which seemed to go on for a very long time.

So what was happening in me at the moment that little guy scurried into my (now) much smaller living space was nothing short of panic. Things were definitely out of balance and I wanted that creature out of my place YESTERDAY!

Traps were set and the mouse was caught within about 24 hours, but I will tell you that my entire being was in a state of alert until it was over.

While this is kind of a silly, amusing example, stress signals like this - mild to severe - typically accompany the individual who is moving into new or unfamiliar territory - whether it’s starting a new job, trying out a new sport, or learning a new skill.

And how much more so when the person is actually trying to change or develop some aspect of their identity, perhaps leaving behind old, entrenched patterns of thinking and behaving?

It’s kind of like the rubber band effect - the impulse is to snap back into the old, familiar “shape.”

In a world filled with busy activity and so many things to distract, it can be difficult to really settle down and just be quiet with myself.

I believe that my body, mind, and spirit have ways of getting my attention, as I wrote a little bit about recently in When the Journey Gets Dark…

As a point of clarification (if anything, for myself!), I wrote a friend this morning:

“…when it comes down to it, we all stand naked and alone before God.

“The ‘alone’ part is what is scary for most and what drives most to find fulfillment in things, people or experiences.

“Without the distractions of things, people, and experiences, life with only ourselves can be pretty unnerving. But I’m coming to understand and believe that this is where God is often revealed to us.”

(NOTE: I know this goes pretty deep for some and my intent definitely is NOT to alienate any readers who are not coming from a Christian, spiritual, or any kind of religious perspective. At the same time, I won’t deny or hold back my own Christian worldview, as it is an integral piece of my own journey.)

Alongside the distractions are the multitude of masks that I am capable of wearing. While the use is usually driven out of the need for self-protection, the result is usually almost always a distancing from my true self and my true potential.

For better or worse, and try as hard as I may, I really can’t divorce myself from myself. Wherever I go, there I am. I always have a choice is to how I will deal with the trappings of life and journey.

There is a selfish, bratty child named Eustace in C.S. Lewis’ “The Voyage of the Dawn Treader” who, left to his own devices, underwent his own ugly transformation when he came across the treasure of a dead dragon…

“He had turned into a dragon while he was asleep. Sleeping on the dragon’s hoard with greedy, dragonish thoughts in his heart, he had become a dragon himself.”

(The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, C.S. Lewis, p. 97)

Awhile back a friend recommended a book that I’d put off reading for many months simply because of the title: “Addiction & Grace - Love and Spirituality in the Healing of Addictions.”

I (and I’m embarrassed to admit it) threw the word “addiction” under the category of substance abuse and shelved it away since I did not have any personal experience with substance abuse.

Well, I eventually picked up the book and was surprised with how helpful it was. Hardly touching on the subject of substance abuse at all, it provides an extremely well-rounded understanding of the nature of addiction - encompassing mind, body, and spirit.

As human beings, we ALL have addictions to and dependencies on something - including thoughts, habits, daily routines, ways of doing things, etc. - even the states of mind that create anger, frustration, and depression, as well as joy, bliss, and exhilaration. Most of it is unconscious.

“…images, memories, fantasies, ideas, concepts, and even certain feeling states can become objects of attachment…Perhaps we have also recognized that there are certain images of ourselves or concepts about the world that we somehow feel deeply forced to hold on to.”

(Gerald May, Addiction & Grace - Love and Spirituality in the Healing of Addictions, p. 25)

For me, coming to terms with my naked, unmasked, and unstripped self is the key to discovering who I truly am, as well as my potential…

“Then the lion said…’You will have to let me undress you.’ I was afraid of its claws, I can tell you, but I was nearly desperate now. So I just lay flat down on my back to let him do it.

The very first tear he made was so deep that I thought it had gone right to my heart. And when he began pulling the skin off, it hurt worse than anything I’ve ever felt.

The only thing that made me able to bear it was just the pleasure of feeling the stuff peel off…and there it was on the grass: only ever so much thicker, and darker, and more knobbly-looking…and there was I as smooth and soft as a peeled switch…”

(The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, C.S. Lewis, p. 115-116

John Maxwell says “If you could see yourself in terms of your true potential, you wouldn’t recognize yourself.” (Talent is Never Enough, p. 16)

What lies beneath the layers could be truly amazing…and I know I for one have barely scratched the surface.

When it comes to adopting new habits, beliefs, and ways of thinking, it comes down to , quite literally, a matter of growing a new brain.

For many decades, scientists and biologists believed that the brains we were born with were not capable of growth or expansion. If sections of the brain were damaged through traumas such as accidents or strokes, it was pretty much tough luck, according to the experts.

But thankfully, through the persistent investigation of scientists, researchers, and average everyday lay people, it has been discovered and proven that the brain is quite capable of expansion, growth, healing, and change.

This is great news for everyone!

For a long time the brain was viewed as a machine that was "hardwired" and unchangeable.

A friend and reader of this blog recently turned me on to a book called "The Brain That Changes Itself," by Norman Doidge, MD. Dr. Doidge chronicles the stories of people who have investigated what has come to be known as "brain plasticity."

"At first many of the scientists didn’t dare use the word ‘neuroplasticity’ in their publications, and their peers belittled them for promoting a fanciful notion. Yet they persisted, slowly overturning the doctrine of the unchanging brain.

They showed that children are not always stuck with the mental abilities they are born with; that the damaged brain can often reorganize itself so that when one part fails, another can often substitute; that if brain cells die, they can at times be replaced; that many ‘circuits’ and even basic reflexes that we think are hardwired are not."

(Norman Doidge, M.D., The Brain That Changes Itself, p. xix)

I think one of the greatest dangers in this world is not terrorism, war, or disease…it’s a closed mind. I’ve seen a mind like this - rigid, unyielding, unteachable, legalistic - leave a path of despair, hurt, and confusion in its wake.

Friendships have been lost, businesses have folded, and lives have been ruined because of people who have been unwilling to open their minds, think out of the box, or view things from a different perspective.

I propose that no matter where any of us are today, we can change ourselves. I would not be writing this blog if I did not believe it possible. 

But it all comes down to taking responsibility for the change. Even if I walk down to my local church, pray the sinner’s prayer, and get dunked in a baptismal tank, I am responsible for walking out that change in daily living!

Nothing comes without effort. Ask any Olympian!

Ever hear the term "elephant in the china shop"? I’ve often heard it used in relation to a secret that everyone knows but no one will talk about or admit. It’s a subject that requires special handling lest everything come crashing down. Daddy’s drinking problem. Uncle Johnny’s gambling habit. Cousin Sally’s divorce.

I remember being in a "china shop" situation several years ago. I was facilitating a workshop of entrepreneurs and business owners.

About 20 men and women were gathered in a small hotel conference room, processing the end of an intense weekend of letting go of lot of emotional baggage.

I remember one of the participants vividly. She had a scowl on her face the entire weekend.

Her husband was with her, but unlike her, he was warm, friendly, and always had a smile on his face. While he freely participated in all of the activities, she always seemed to be holding back.

At the end of this long weekend everyone had the opportunity to process their experience, get feedback, and receive assistance with any remaining issues they felt they needed help with.

When it came time for this woman to speak up, we got an earful: How she resented his ability to be at peace with himself when 20 or 30 years ago he had done such and such to her.

Now "such and such" turned out to be something completely minor and petty. I couldn’t believe this woman nursed such hatred and resentment for her husband over such a long period of time over something so trivial.

Everyone was trying to make her feel better, in essence to rescue her from her feelings. They were just talking at her - blah, blah, blah.

Meanwhile, I started feeling this anger boiling inside me. Here I’m supposed to be facilitating everything and I’m starting to have this emotional reaction to what was going on with this woman, and all the well-meaning individuals who were attempting to placate her feelings.

Maybe it was because I had been the target of similarly vicious assaults of pettiness in my past. Maybe it was because I had taken the brunt of completely irrational hatred at one time or another.

Whatever it was…I LOST IT.

Yes I did. Lost it.

I launched into this woman with the most colorful language anyone had ever heard come out of my mouth at that point:

"How dare you hold this against him and not forgive him! He’s told you over and over again that he was sorry. He’s asked your forgiveness, and yet you keep holding it over him like that. Who do you think you are??? You have to forgive him. It’s your problem now, not his."

Everyone’s jaws dropped. I was beat red. The head guy was about ready to intervene.

I don’t remember much of what happened afterward. I do remember feeling ashamed for being so hard on that woman. In fact, I remember questioning what I had done and really beating myself up about it.

Now here’s the amazing thing. I saw the coordinater of the worshop nearly a year later. He told me that after I confronted her she changed. She became a client of his and started working on her stuff. She became warmer, more friendly, and was a totally different person.

She let go and forgave her husband.

I have no idea why I was the person appointed to the deliver the goods to this person. I suspect there were others who could have, but were probably focused on soothing the symptoms rather than diagnosing the problem. A lot of people do that though. Who wants to rock the boat and potentially lose a friend?

I’m not sure that I would recommend my particular approach, but I will say that the times I’ve grown the most have been when people (friends, coaches, mentors, etc.) have confronted me. They didn’t shove truth down my throat, but they did shine the light in such a way that I either saw things from a different perspective or became aware of my blind spots.

Confrontation isn’t easy, and the truth can often be both very revealing and very cutting at the same time.

But it can also be very healing.

And a starting point for change.

I don’t know about you, but the moment I decide that I want to change something in my life, all of my resistance sets in.

I had a Sheltie growing up and it always cracked me up whenever I pulled her chain hard to come with me. She would always pull back. We’re talking full-out resistance and totally digging her paws in the ground so as not to budge! 

I remember times I would pull her leash hard on purpose just to watch her do it. It never failed. She would aways fight me!

The best approach was to gently coax her and lightly pull her leash. She would always go where I wanted when I handled her that way!

“As we develop new beliefs about who we are, our behavior will change to support the new identity.”

(Tony Robbins, Awaken the Giant Within, p. 416)

I firmly believe it’s possible to do almost anything I set my mind to. It’s the “setting my mind to” part that’s the most challenging! This requires cooperation and gentle coaxing with myself. The forced approach rarely works.

You see, when I set my mind to doing something new or unfamiliar, I dig my own “paws” in the ground to resist moving forward.

Several years ago I was invited to help facilitate a workshop designed to assist attendees in breaking through the things that held them back. I figured I should probably do my own homework on that subject and decided to spend the day walking around busy areas of town and practice introducing myself to and talking with strangers.

The thought of doing this practically put me in a state of paralysis.

How did I get past that? I began imagining myself meeting people and having a great experience doing it. I began developing a positive picture in my mind of what I was going to do and then I just started doing it.

I had a blast!

So what am I talking about here? My beliefs about who I am and what I can do are malleable rather than fixed. They can change.

Imagination, visualization, meditation, affirmations…these are all methods of gently coaxing my new beliefs forward until they become part of me. New behaviors are sure to follow.

Give it a try!

Breaking away from the pack, rising above the norm, living a life of excellence…in a world of “don’t rock the boat” complacency, acting in a manner that sets you apart can certainly draw the fire of critics.

Yep! I struggle with this one! And while I do fear the critics (keeping it honest here), the one I unfortunately heed the most is myself.

“Our sense of certainty about who we are creates the boundaries and limits within which we live.”
(Tony Robbins, Awaken the Giant Within, p. 413)

Sometimes I can be pretty opinionated over what I believe about myself and what I can do. Okay, “pretty opinionated” is a little tame. How about TONS opinionated?

When I returned from my trip to the future (see Handling Discouragement: Developing a Passion), I shared that listening to my own “opinions” about what others thought was one of the biggest challenges on my way to success.

This drive to be consistent with who I believe I am can be pretty powerful. I know that whenever I venture away from those core beliefs, not only do I feel uncertain, I feel pretty dang anxious.

“…changing ourselves - changing the essence of who we are - is perceived by most to be impossible. The common response , ‘I’m just this way,’ is a phrase that murders dreams. It carries with it the sentence of an unchangeable and permanent problem.”

(Tony Robbins, Awaken the Giant Within, p. 415)

But here’s the rub: it’s either change addresses or live a mediocre, unfulfilled, dispassionate life. Hmmmm…let me think that one over… Okay! Let’s pack it up!

I took a telecourse last weekend called The Art and Science of Achieving Your Goals and Dreams. Part of my pre-course homework involved writing a life purpose statement, as well as a vision statement for my life (what my life would be like living at the peak of success and the achievement of my goals and dreams). I will share them both.

Purpose

“The purpose of my life is to learn and grow, inspiring others along the way, and showing them they too can do the same.”

Vision

“I am living a life of complete emotional freedom. I love myself and others freely and unconditionally. I have learned to master my thoughts and emotions in such a way that I’ve come to trust and honor myself and my abilities at a whole new level. I can state a goal and know I will reach it because I am congruent and honor my promises to myself. I accept all learning curves and have learned to be patient with myself and others as a result.

The aforementioned emotional freedom has enabled me to move into financial freedom. I am free to ask and receive. I can hold an intention with complete faith because I know it will come to pass. This has enabled me to exceed my financial targets. I am attracting money, business, and partnerships at increasing levels of speed and earn in excess of $________K a year.”

I launched this blog to find, reach out to, and connect with others on this level. I know there is great power to be found in accountability and I’ve already seen how some of you out there have been awakened to your own dreams and goals and have gotten that extra push to take your own steps of faith.

So with that said, “you know who” paid me a visit this week. Yes, that would be “Dennis.” (Refer to Self Acceptance: Building Belief in Yourself While Going for Your Dreams to learn more about him!) I had been working toward a particular financial goal over the past couple of years and had somewhat of a setback in relation to it a few days ago.

These things happen.

Of the myriad reactions I had building in me, one of the more healthy responses was to talk about it here. After all, this is the before, during, and after story. In doing so I live out my chosen purpose in the present, and set the stage for achieving my vision in the future.

Even though what happened sucks (I won’t go into details yet), it’s pretty cool to realize it’s still working in my favor!

At some point faith always gets tested. Holding the course, especially during moments of discouragement, is the key to getting to the other side.

Can I hear an Amen?

In a previous post, Building Belief with a Burning Desire to Succeed in Whatever You Set Your Mind To, I touched on the concept of faith.

I’m not a theologian by any stretch of the imagination, so this is my bare-bones, working man’s (or shall I say Lab Rat’s?) definition of the word:

Faith is believing, and even seeing in your mind’s eye, something you cannot physically see or sense.

It’s believing something to be real and true, even if it is contrary to or conflicts with what you are experiencing. There is no evidence that it is true but you believe it is true.

This is probably where we get the term “blind faith” from.

I think most people are introduced to the idea of faith in conjunction with some type of spiritual belief, however I don’t believe that any religion has a corner on the market when it comes to faith. I believe it is available to anyone for the taking.

One of the top songs in my daily ritual for success is “Faith” by a Swedish artist named Leana. It’s another one of those songs (and yes, there a LOT of those songs) that really resonates with me.

The lyrics are very simple. Here’s a sampling…

I didn’t want to know you
Didn’t want to show you
Who I was

What if I told you?
What if I showed you?
Would you see? Maybe, baby

‘Cause when I open the door
I just want to make sure
I won’t need to close it again

Faith
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
‘Cause I’ve been waiting such a long time

I’ve found it extremely easy to live in and believe that the only reality is the reality that I experience today with my physical senses. That includes beliefs I’ve come to adopt over time.

Beliefs about my value, worth, abilities, talents, skills.

Beliefs about my relationships, family, friends, income, job.

Beliefs about what I can accomplish in life.

Beliefs about what I can give in life.

But what about faith?

If I, David, want to make any kind of change in my life, to some degree I have to believe it is possible before receiving any kind of evidence that it is.

About ten years ago I was taking a medication that caused my weight to balloon out 25 pounds. To this day I can’t stand looking at pictures of myself from that time. When I spoke with the doctor about my concerns, she told me to get used to it because it was a known side effect and nothing could be done to change it.

For awhile I believed her.

Then I heard about a book called “Body for Life” and I saw all these Before and After pictures of people who’d transformed themselves physically in 90 days.

My mind went to the possibility of believing something else.

I followed the principles and steps laid out in the book, even though I had NO EVIDENCE that it would work for me.

I would call that faith.

I would also call every day I worked out and every meal I ate and every glass of water I drank and every supplement I took mini steps of faith throughout the whole process.

I lost the 25 pounds.

Here’s the best part: when that doctor saw me, she couldn’t believe it. Now how’s that for irony!!!

There is a real dance with faith when it comes to pursuing goals and dreams. And it can be tainted with a lot of ambivalence at times…

I didn’t want to know you
Didn’t want to show you
Who I was

What if I told you?
What if I showed you?
Would you see? Maybe, baby

‘Cause when I open the door
I just want to make sure
I won’t need to close it again

So, on the edge of making any kind of decision to move forward in anything in life (new career, new relationship, new body, new business, new habits), faith stands willing to take its believers across the bridge into that new reality.

And honestly, I believe it even has the capability of carrying us all the way across until our feet are firmly planted in that new reality.

Here are the lyrics (at least my stab at them) for “Faith” and if the play button has disappeared (a known issue!) you can listen to the song here.

Faith, Leana

Faith…
Faith…
Faith…

I didn’t want to know you
Didn’t want to show you
Who I was

What if I told you?
What if I showed you?
Would you see? Maybe, baby

‘Cause when I open the door
I just want to make sure
I won’t need to close it again

Faith
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
‘Cause I’ve been waiting such a long time

Faith
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
‘Cause I’ve been waiting, waiting such a long time

Faith…

Faith…

Faith…

I didn’t want to go there
Didn’t want to know there was something else
Higher than the mountain
Higher than the sky far over my head

‘Cause when I open the door
I just want to make sure
I won’t need to close it again

Faith
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
‘Cause I’ve been waiting such a long time

Faith
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
‘Cause I’ve been waiting, waiting such a long time

For this…

Faith
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
‘Cause I’ve been waiting such a long time

Faith
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
‘Cause I’ve been waiting such a long time

Faith
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
‘Cause I’ve been waiting, waiting such a long time

I’ve got faith

I’ve got faith.

Several years ago I read an article by Robert G. Allen. A quote from that article has stayed with me ever since: “What if someone offered you ten million dollars to turn your life around right now? How much would it take for you to be motivated to perfect your relationships, to get in shape, to get your financial act together, to be a top salesperson, etc? What if you decided that YOU ARE THE BEFORE AND AFTER STORY?” What an intriguing

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Writing, teaching, and inspiring others have always been passions of mine, but for them to mean anything to me they have to be coming from the perspective of someone who’s walking the talk.  To me, anything short of that comes across as plain old boring, intellectual headiness.  In writing this, I’m making the assumption there’s at least someone else out there who feels the same way. So I’m figuring up a recipe I’d

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