• Welcome
  • Blog
  • About


 Digging The Well

  • Tag Cloud

    • A New Earth accomplishments accountability Achievement achieving-success acting addiction affirmations becoming-unstoppable before-and-after before-and-after-story Beliefs believability believing in yourself body language brain plasticity breaking through burning-desire Challenges champion-qualities Change Changing Habits changing yourself
  • Recent Posts

    • Kissing and All That Drama 11.29
    • Disturbia…Thoughts on Imagination 11.27
    • Yes, That Was a Dial Tone…Starting a Conversation in a Disconnected Age 11.25
    • The Saddest Story in the Whole Wide World 11.24
    • Letting Go: Lessons from a Love Ballad 11.23
    • Let Go, My Ego…Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow 11.21
    • Faith Versus Intellect: Breaking Through to the True Self 11.13
    • Belief and Confidence: Going After the Ball or Hiding From It? 10.15
    • The System that Keeps Everything in Check 10.13
    • Uncovering the True Self to Reveal Its Potential on the Journey 10.11
  • Categories

    • Self Improvement
    • Self Help
    • Goals
    • Strategy
    • Visualization
    • Imagination
    • Purpose
    • Connecting
    • Transformation
    • Motivation
    • Relationships
    • Influence
    • Emotional Mastery
    • Inspiration
    • Identity
    • Goal Setting
    • Facing Fears
    • Faith
    • Beliefs
    • Changing Habits
    • Achievement
    • Phobias
    • Personal Growth
    • Challenges
    • Process of Change
    • changing-beliefs

Kissing and All That Drama

November 29th, 2008
· Filed Under: Beliefs · Imagination

I recently picked up the book, “An Actor’s Work,” by Konstantin Stanislavski.
Stanislavski was an early 20th century Russian actor and theater director. The story is told of a dog that would come to his rehearsals:

A Beach Kiss by Michael Sarver, http://www.flickr.com/photos/michaelsarver/“…being rather lazy, [the dog] would sleep in the corner all day long. Strangely, every evening, just before the actors were to finish, the dog would be at the door, leash in mouth, waiting to be taken home. What astonished Stanislavski was that the dog would wearily haul himself to his feet several minutes before his master called him.

“Regular as clockwork…the dog would trot to the door and wait there patiently. Now how could a dog possibly know that the rehearsal was over before anyone moved to the door? Finally Stanislavski figured it out. The dog could hear when the actors started talking like normal human beings again.

“The difference between the fake and the living was just as sharp as Pavlov’s bell.”

(Declan Donnellan, Introduction, “An Actor’s Work,” p. ix)

I’ve become fascinated by this idea of what makes characters on TV shows or movies so believable. I mean, believable to the point where the viewer suspends their disbelief, enters into the fictional world, and actually believes everything happening is real.

I was watching one of my favorite shows, Smallville, the other day, and was struck by how believable the characters were to me. I believed their words, their emotions, and their body language.

I’m sure there are many of us who have witnessed bad acting. Poor scripts aside, bad acting (for me) is acting that is hollow, wooden, and devoid of soul and character. I don’t believe the actor’s portrayal. I don’t believe his or her character is real.

If there’s anything that I’m attempting to get to the heart of, it’s the essence of what makes a person believable, even to themselves. I KNOW when I don’t believe something about myself. But on the flipside, I also know when I DO believe something about myself.

Usually what I don’t believe lies on the surface. You know, like some kind of lotion that doesn’t penetrate the skin barrier and feels all greasy.

But what I do believe has penetrated my very soul. It has a life of its own. It’s something I would fight for.

And the crossing of this divide is what many people in the acting community accomplish daily, which is why a friend encouraged me to explore the subject.

Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman were interviewed by Oprah recently about their new movie, “Australia.” Nicole gave a really great insight into how that divide is bridged when she talked about her approach to the kissing scenes:

“…you do have to step into this place…especially when it’s romantic…where you have to be true to the characters. So a lot of it is still creating mystery between you so that there is chemistry…We both would have to commit to that…and then you step out of it and you go back to your life…

“But there is this sort of imaginary existence that you have to commit to…You have to commit to the love of the moment in the scene and then you walk away from it. You go back to your life…but you have to make it believable in that moment…you have to be real…it has to vibrate through me. And then you shed it. You go back to your life.”

On a funny note, another friend of mine recounted a time when his buddy was pulled over for doing some major speeding. As the officer approached the window, my friend (on the passenger side) leaned forward, groaning that he had to get to a restroom fast or he wasn’t going to make it.

While my friend isn’t an actor, he sure was committed to his part. The cop let his buddy off…



Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: acting, Beliefs, believability, body language, character, chemistry, emotions, Imagination, reality, soul, suspension of disbelief

2 Comments

Disturbia…Thoughts on Imagination

November 27th, 2008
· Filed Under: Emotional Mastery · Facing Fears · Imagination · Phobias

“Worry is a poor use of the imagination,” I heard someone say the other day. I’ve also heard it said that worry is nothing but negative prayer.

Worried or Be Gentle With Me by Daniel Horacio Agostini, http://www.flickr.com/photos/dhammza/What’s wrong with me?
Why do I feel like this?
I’m going crazy now

No more gas in the rig
Can’t even get it started
Nothing heard, nothing said
Can’t even speak about it
All my life on my head
Don’t want to think about it
Feels like I’m going insane
Yeah

It’s a thief in the night
To come and grab you
It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you
It’s too close for comfort

(From “Disturbia” by Rihanna)

“A person will worship something, have no doubt about that. We may think our tribute is paid in secret in the dark recesses of our hearts, but it will out. That which dominates our imaginations and our thoughts will determine our lives, and our character. Therefore, it behooves us to be careful what we worship, for what we are worshipping we are becoming.”  (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must falter be wise
Your mind is in disturbia
It’s like the darkness is the light

(From “Disturbia” by Rihanna)

“Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere.” (Carl Sagan)

Release me from this curse I’m in
Trying to maintain
But I’m struggling

(From “Disturbia” by Rihanna)

“Imagination is more important than knowledge. For while knowledge defines all we currently know and understand, imagination points to all we might yet discover and create.”  (Albert Einstein)

For good or for ill, imagination is mine to wield…



Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: Facing Fears, Imagination

No Comments

Faith Versus Intellect: Breaking Through to the True Self

November 13th, 2008
· Filed Under: Beliefs · Challenges · Facing Fears · Faith · Identity · Imagination

A lot of people (myself included) tend to define themselves in terms of their personal history: successes and failures, achievements and setbacks, education, family, relationships, jobs, etc. 

Admittedly, the nature of time and my own physical body provide a pretty compelling argument that who I am today, indeed all that I am, is soley the culmination of my past and present. What else is there?

The Wall, by Laura Chifiriuc, http://www.flickr.com/photos/lchifi/But lately I’ve come to realize there’s more to it than that.

If I go with the premise that yesterday and today is all there is, then life (for me at least) would be truly meaningless.

However, coming from both a spiritual and Christian perspective, I believe that all human beings have an eternal nature to them and therefore simultaneously exist in the future as well. 

Taking it a step further to account for this future true and eternal self opens a multitude of possibilities.

This concept is something I’ve been resisting for quite some time too. “Resisting” sounds a little weak. I’ve been pretty much fighting against the notion.

Whatever the reason, my defenses have been pretty strong. It probably means there is something really important on the other side of that wall.

But while my defenses are strong, I kind of doubt that storming or blasting the wall away is the answer. Truthfully, I think all that’s required is to just plain ‘ole walk through the wall.

Translation: it’s a faith transaction rather than an intellectual one.

I’ve had a handful of moments over the past several months where I’ve gotten an inkling of what’s on the other side of the wall.

I remember a couple of times when this feeling of peace came out of nowhere. I had the impression that no matter how the story looked at the present time, the ending was still good. I wasn’t reading or doing anything at the moment that would have triggered that feeling. It literally came out of the blue.

While those felt like “God” moments, there were other times where the impression felt less like God and more like, well, me. And this is where it might sound a little weird. It wasn’t me today, but me somewhere in the future…the future on the other side of that wall…if I chose to walk through it in faith.

I’m going to segway a little with an insight that Tony Robbins gives in regards to the art of race car driving:

“The number-one fundamental they teach in driving is: Focus on where you want to go, not on what you fear…Drivers know that you go where you look; you travel the direction of your focus. If you resist your fear, have faith, and focus on where you want to go, your actions will take you in that direction.”
(Awaken the Giant Within, p. 161)

A number of years ago I attended a seminar where I had the opportunity to break a board with my bare hand. The key to breaking it, however, was not found in physical strength or sheer will power. It was in quietly first seeing (in my mind’s eye) my hand go through the board, and then just doing it.

Everyone who tried to break the board through brute strength failed, to the point where some even hurt themselves.

Focusing on the wall, the barrier, the fear…this doesn’t seem to work. Changing the focus to what’s on the other side of it, well that seems to be the trick.

There comes a point, however, where intellect (personal history) must be left behind in favor of embracing a truth that cannot be seen by the naked eye and which has no rational, intellectual means for being.

Hmmmmm…something to think about.

So, on behalf of my future true self, and in honor of passing through that wall, here’s something from Mon A Q that’s had a lot of meaning for me lately (lyrics below):

Its My Turn (Front Radio Edit) - Mon A Q

 “It’s My Turn,” Mon A Q

There was a time
Didn’t think i could make it
One more day
I never thought
I could take this all the way
Shared my love
With anybody in need
I found the courage
I need for me
I’m gonna sing my song

And it’s my turn
I’m here to take it
Get outta my way
’cause i’ve gotta make it
It’s my turn
Got to keep on pushin’
I’m headin’ higher
And higher and higher
And it’s my turn
And nobody else
Gonna take it away
Is gonna take this away
And it’s my turn
I know i deserve it
I’m headin’ higher
And higher and higher

There was a love we had
I thought would never ever end
You were my lover
But now you’re not even my friend
I’ve wasted my time
Coulda been shoulda been
Livin my own dreams
No no no it’s not too late

Now i’m singin’ for me

I can’t wait
I can’t stop
I’ve got to give love
All i’ve got
What i do
I do just for me

Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: breaking through, Faith, focus, the true self

No Comments

Uncovering the True Self to Reveal Its Potential on the Journey

October 11th, 2008
· Filed Under: Changing Habits · Identity · Imagination · Transformation · changing-beliefs

In a world filled with busy activity and so many things to distract, it can be difficult to really settle down and just be quiet with myself.

I believe that my body, mind, and spirit have ways of getting my attention, as I wrote a little bit about recently in When the Journey Gets Dark…

Dragon y Luna, by Luis Alejandro Bernal Romero, http://www.flickr.com/photos/aztlek/As a point of clarification (if anything, for myself!), I wrote a friend this morning:

“…when it comes down to it, we all stand naked and alone before God.

“The ‘alone’ part is what is scary for most and what drives most to find fulfillment in things, people or experiences.

“Without the distractions of things, people, and experiences, life with only ourselves can be pretty unnerving. But I’m coming to understand and believe that this is where God is often revealed to us.”

(NOTE: I know this goes pretty deep for some and my intent definitely is NOT to alienate any readers who are not coming from a Christian, spiritual, or any kind of religious perspective. At the same time, I won’t deny or hold back my own Christian worldview, as it is an integral piece of my own journey.)

Alongside the distractions are the multitude of masks that I am capable of wearing. While the use is usually driven out of the need for self-protection, the result is usually almost always a distancing from my true self and my true potential.

For better or worse, and try as hard as I may, I really can’t divorce myself from myself. Wherever I go, there I am. I always have a choice is to how I will deal with the trappings of life and journey.

There is a selfish, bratty child named Eustace in C.S. Lewis’ “The Voyage of the Dawn Treader” who, left to his own devices, underwent his own ugly transformation when he came across the treasure of a dead dragon…

“He had turned into a dragon while he was asleep. Sleeping on the dragon’s hoard with greedy, dragonish thoughts in his heart, he had become a dragon himself.”

(The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, C.S. Lewis, p. 97)

Awhile back a friend recommended a book that I’d put off reading for many months simply because of the title: “Addiction & Grace - Love and Spirituality in the Healing of Addictions.”

I (and I’m embarrassed to admit it) threw the word “addiction” under the category of substance abuse and shelved it away since I did not have any personal experience with substance abuse.

Well, I eventually picked up the book and was surprised with how helpful it was. Hardly touching on the subject of substance abuse at all, it provides an extremely well-rounded understanding of the nature of addiction - encompassing mind, body, and spirit.

As human beings, we ALL have addictions to and dependencies on something - including thoughts, habits, daily routines, ways of doing things, etc. - even the states of mind that create anger, frustration, and depression, as well as joy, bliss, and exhilaration. Most of it is unconscious.

“…images, memories, fantasies, ideas, concepts, and even certain feeling states can become objects of attachment…Perhaps we have also recognized that there are certain images of ourselves or concepts about the world that we somehow feel deeply forced to hold on to.”

(Gerald May, Addiction & Grace - Love and Spirituality in the Healing of Addictions, p. 25)

For me, coming to terms with my naked, unmasked, and unstripped self is the key to discovering who I truly am, as well as my potential…

“Then the lion said…’You will have to let me undress you.’ I was afraid of its claws, I can tell you, but I was nearly desperate now. So I just lay flat down on my back to let him do it.

The very first tear he made was so deep that I thought it had gone right to my heart. And when he began pulling the skin off, it hurt worse than anything I’ve ever felt.

The only thing that made me able to bear it was just the pleasure of feeling the stuff peel off…and there it was on the grass: only ever so much thicker, and darker, and more knobbly-looking…and there was I as smooth and soft as a peeled switch…”

(The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, C.S. Lewis, p. 115-116

John Maxwell says “If you could see yourself in terms of your true potential, you wouldn’t recognize yourself.” (Talent is Never Enough, p. 16)

What lies beneath the layers could be truly amazing…and I know I for one have barely scratched the surface.

Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: addiction, Changing Habits, changing-thoughts, Christian journey, Christianity, developing potential, discovering potential, Identity, journey of success, life's journey, pilgrammage, Process of Change, spiritual journey, spirituality, the journey, thought life, true self, uncovering the true self

No Comments

Encountering the Sirens’ Call on the Journey

October 10th, 2008
· Filed Under: Beliefs · Emotional Mastery · Faith · Identity · Imagination · Purpose

Coming across someone who has brought their life to a screeching halt can be a scary thing sometimes. As human beings I firmly believe we are meant to always be moving, growing, learning, changing, and though it sounds strange, evolving.

Personally, I don’t think we’re meant to just “hang out” here, biding time through our entire existence.

I know that when I put everything on hold and ignore the signals of movement and growth that are happening inside me I can become very depressed, almost despairing.

Ulysses and the Sirens, by litmuse/GR L, http://www.flickr.com/photos/litmuse/It’s especially keen when I know and feel that it is a higher calling stirring within me.

Unfortunately, in today’s world, it is all too easy to put off, hit the snooze button, or utterly ignore those whispers of meaning and purpose that are always beckoning the human soul to its higher purpose.

There are so many distractions available, so many ways to dull the message coming toward me.

When I continually ignore the message, this other side of me manifests. Affectionately (or not so), this entity known as “Dennis” (see Self Acceptance: Building Belief in Yourself While Going for Your Dreams) comes equipped with his own beliefs, habits, imagination, and will. And subsequently, he rules as if there is no other reality.

C.S. Lewis beautifully depicts a similar manifestation in his book, “The Silver Chair.” A prince is captured by an evil queen and put under an enchantment that transforms him into a conceited, self-absorbed…jerk.

He must be bound in a chair, however, during times when the enchantment is lifted and his “right mind” comes back to him.

While under the spell, he has everyone convinced that he is who he says he is and the other, true self, is the bad guy, the one to keep bound up.

“Listen while I am master of myself. When the fit is upon me, it well may be that I shall beg and implore you, with entreaties and threatenings, to loosen my bonds…I shall call upon you by all that is most dear and most dreadful. But do not listen to me…For while I am bound you are safe. But if once I were up and out of this chair, then first would come my fury, and after that” - he shuddered - “the change into a loathsome serpent.”

(The Silver Chair, C.S. Lewis, p. 170)

One of my favorite quotes is by Marianne Williamson:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.”

I believe this to be both a very profound and very accurate statement.

But for the “spells” that I and many others put themselves under, there is so much that we could probably accomplish. Instead, many of us find ourselves like Ulysses in Homer’s Odyssey, in danger of crashing against the rocks by the enticing song of the Sirens that attempts to pull us away from the journey and our destiny.

Thankfully the spell lifts, the danger passes, and the right mind is returned to once again call the sojourner forward.

“Have they told you that if I am released from this chair I shall kill you and become a serpent? I see by your faces that they have. It is a lie. It is at this hour that I am in my right mind.”

(The Silver Chair, C.S. Lewis, p. 172)

I am fully capable of convincing myself and the world around me that I am someone else when I am in the “Dennis” mindset. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, he ain’t a very attractive guy. In fact, he’s a counterfeit to all that is good, true, and noble within me.

And as they say, like attracts like.

And for those who either love or hate the book and/or movie “The Secret,” this is what I’m talking about. The kids in C.S. Lewis’ book couldn’t stand the prince when he was under the spell.

There is a lot to be said for being grounded in one’s true self.

Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: Beliefs, Emotional Mastery, Faith, Identity, Imagination, Purpose

No Comments

Focus, Meaning and Purpose on the Journey

October 9th, 2008
· Filed Under: Faith · Imagination · Purpose

A good friend of mine recently shared something remarkable with me. I had sent him an email sharing some of the internal challenges I was dealing with and their seemingly (to me) lack of purpose or meaning. He said the email and the difficulties I described blessed him.

Hike, by Rick Harrison, http://www.flickr.com/photos/sovietuk/While this leg of my journey seemed to have no value whatsoever to me, it had great value to my friend.

It made me wonder.

Perhaps the life I live isn’t for me or about me at all. Perhaps it is lived for others to see.

And here’s something else I’ve heard over and over again from multitude of places:

Whatever I focus on grows.

I like what the Bible says about it:

“…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)

I’ve heard stories of concentration camp survivors who lived through horrendous experiences by practicing that principal…

“The intensification of inner life helped the prisoner find a refuge from the emptiness, desolation and spiritual poverty of his existence…”

“Even though conditions such as lack of sleep, insufficient food and various mental stresses may suggest that the inmates were bound to react in certain ways, in the final analysis it becomes clear that the sort person the prisoner became was the result of an inner decision, and not the result of camp influences alone. Fundamentally, therefore, man can even under such circumstances, decide what shall become of him - mentally and spiritually. He may retain his human dignity even in a concentration camp.”

(Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning, p. 50, 75)

It’s amazing how quickly my state of mind changes when I change my focus. It compounds when I combine it with some type of activity - for example, writing. Not introspective, depressing writing, but writing that lifts me up and connects me with a greater purpose…

…perhaps even a life lived in front of others.

Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: Faith, focus, Imagination, meaning, Purpose

No Comments

Changing Yourself: Using Imagination to Ignite Belief

August 12th, 2008
· Filed Under: Beliefs · Emotional Mastery · Facing Fears · Faith · Imagination · Visualization

The story is told of a trapeze artist who was teaching a student how to overcome his fear of performing on one of the high bars of the trapeze:

"I can’t do it! I can’t do it!" [the student] gasped. …In a reassuring tone [the instructor] told him, "Son, you can do it! And I tell you how. Throw your heart over the bar and your body will follow."

Throw your heart over the bar and your body will follow. That is such an amazing image!

Ascending the PoleI know what it’s like to be high up. A few years ago I had the opportunity to fling myself toward a trapeze bar too. It was during an exercise at a Tony Robbins event in Puerto Rico.

All of us [courageous] participants climbed these very tall poles, perched ourselves atop the skinny mounts, and leaped for the trapeze bar. Some of us fell crashing to our deaths…

(okay, that was for dramatic emphasis…remember we were all harnessed in, no one died!)

…like I was saying, some of us missed the trapeze and hung suspended by the cables.

Some chickened out and climbed back down the pole. And others went for it with all they had and grabbed that sucker.

Well, of course I grabbed it! Do you think I’d be writing this if I didn’t??? 

There was no way in heck I was heading back home with the regret of missing my opportunity to clinch that bar! (That’s me in the pics at the bottom of this post.)

I remember just seeing myself grab ahold of that bar and then I went for it. What an exhilerating feeling!

"A small amount of ability and a lot of desire will go a long way."
(Dr. Tom Massey, The ABC’s of Effective Leadership, p. 80)

This ability to see myself as being somewhere or doing something before it happens is so powerful. It is SO POWERFUL!

I’m experiencing this right now. I started this nightly ritual of taking an evening shower before heading off to bed.

I have a visualization of my perfect day laminated and stuck on the shower wall. It details the things I want to feel and do when I wake up, the people I want to meet and connect with throughout the day, and the types of results and successes I want to experience.

I read this visualization while I’m relaxing in the shower and just let my imagination flow.

Then I go to bed.

Then I wake up.

And I do it again! I take a morning shower and read the same visualization. Thoughts and ideas come to me and I feel all this courage to take action on what I see in my imagination.

And I take action.

This has been so much fun.

Wait. Fun isn’t strong enough!

It’s exciting, thrilling, energizing!! It’s self-perpetuating, growing, and compounding.

I step out in one area I imagine, and I get a flood of new ideas, desires, and thoughts of other things I can be doing.

And my belief in myself sky-rockets.

"We are either the masters or the victims of our attitudes. It is a matter of personal choice. Who we are today is the result of choices made yesterday. Tomorrow we will become what we choose today. To change means to choose to change."

(John Maxwell, The Winning Attitude, p. 145)

So I continue to climb that pole and leap for the bar.

And I’m doing it before my body ever reaches it!

Assessing the Situation

Going for It

 

 

 

 

 

 

Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: Beliefs, changing yourself, Imagination, Visualization

3 Comments

Changing Yourself: The Power of Self-Affirming Declarations Part III

August 3rd, 2008
· Filed Under: Beliefs · Faith · Goals · Identity · Imagination · Visualization

Children have such wonderful imaginations. Get around a little kid for awhile and you will inevitably get the sense that anything is possible for them…at all of 5, 6, 7 years old!

They are teachers, firefighters, policemen, soldiers, presidents, celebrities. Their imaginations are usually completely unbridled! And they usually have no fear either. They will try and do just about anything. They exhibit amazing confidence and determination until…

Ahhhhh, yes. Until.

Crayons - 2, by Brian Bitanga, http://www.flickr.com/photos/7350926@N05/Until the adult world begins to squeeze them into that teeny, weeny constrictive box. Their dreams become systematically dismantled. They hear the word "no" over and over again. They become ridiculed for their goals of wanting to be, do, and become more.

In essence: They become adults.

It’s sad but true. Fear overcomes faith. Reality replaces dreams. Mediocre becomes the highest standard for earning the measliest of raises.

But what happened to that childlike imagination? What happened to believing we could become whoever we wanted to be?

I will be bold as to say it never went away. It lies in all us, albeit dormant for many.

I sincerely believe everyone was brought into the world for a reason. Each of us has unique abilities that were meant to be contributed for the betterment of the world around us. I am a man of faith, so I believe that God put me here for a reason and that he has prepared specific things for me to do.

But for all the reasons I am writing this blog, I have my "hang-ups," the adult issues of living in a world where it isn’t always cool to think so differently from your neighbor, rock the boat, or trip up the status quo. You can read about some of my challenges in The Before Story…The Starting Point for Change.

So what to do…

How about getting back to dreaming and imagining like a child? Afterall, that ability never went away, though it may take some coaxing to come back for some.

I’ve been talking about affirmations, self-declarations, "I Am" statements, and the like. I guess to be brutally honest, it comes down to being like a kid again.

Who cares if whatever you’re declaring isn’t happening now? It could, couldn’t it?

Who cares if I’m not that kind of person today? I could be someday, couldn’t I?

And if I or anyone else is living a mediocre or unfulfilled existence right now, then isn’t it possible to believe that the only way is up??? Or would is it bettter to go down a few more levels until we’re six feet under?

So, I am now entering the Dream Zone. Yes, DREAM. As in IMAGINATION.

Here’s who I am…

I am creative.
I am an entrepreneur.
I am a man with a mission.
I am a man discoving his purpose.
I am a communicator.
I am a networker.
I am an artist.
I am a wordsmith.
I am an influencer.
I am a child of God.
I am growing.
I am determined.
I am courageous.
I am confident.
I am a leader.

When I look up my name in the dictionary I see:

"A man determined to overcome all odds to fulfill his mission and purpose in life. Bright, energetic, and highly creative. A person of great influence. A leader. Courageous and willing to go after whatever he wants no matter how difficult."

Many affirmations are declarations of what is already true, but perhaps forgotten or buried under years of neglect. Other affirmations are declarations of attributes that are sought after.

And if the world has beaten the dreamer out of any of us, many affirmations could very well be the bridge back to who we were destined to become when we were placed on this planet in the first place.

I am only limited by the scope of my imagination.

So dream, and dream BIG.

Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: affirmations, Beliefs, changing yourself, developing beliefs, developing confidence, developing courage, dreaming big, dreams, Imagination, self-talk, Visualization

4 Comments

Changing Yourself: Handling Fear and Its Deceptive Qualities

July 22nd, 2008
· Filed Under: Emotional Mastery · Facing Fears · Faith · Imagination · Phobias

Where does fear come from and what purpose does it serve? I would venture to say (and I know I’ve read it somewhere) that fear is a protective mechanism. It keeps me from doing things that could potentially hurt me or put me in danger.

Fear by Loretta Prencipe, http://www.flickr.com/photos/lorettaprencipe/So in that regard, fear is my friend.

But what about fears that stem from events in my past or from what other people have said or done to me? They seem real enough. Couldn’t they be protecting me too?

I’ve alluded a couple of times on this blog to some, er…less than stellar periods in my childhood. Kids can be cruel. Kids without restraint can be downright vicious.

Second period math class in the 7th grade was my time for fear conditioning.

Let’s see…jeering, taunting, gesturing, labeling, name-calling, full-out rejection…. That pretty much summed up what it was like every time I walked into that classroom, with really no breaks at all.

I was ever so thankful for holidays, weekends, and the summer vacation I was able to finally leave that class behind for good…

…or so I thought.

I kept the memories.

 Or maybe they kept me…

“I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” (Mark Twain)

Throughout my adulthood I’ve found my mind playing tricks on me when it’s come to these memories.

I saw many of the worst culprits from my junior high days several years ago at my 20 year high school reunion. They were so mellow they wouldn’t hurt a fly!

And yet, even after seeing these men and women in the present day, I found that the old memories still persisted, creating these imaginary fears of people and what they thought about me. 

So if in time I’ve come to realize that the traumas of my past were still in my past, what do I do in the present time?

False
Evidence
Appearing
Real 

I used to think that acronym was a little hokey until I began to understand how my imagination could work either for or against me.

What I’ve come to realize is that I have a choice when it comes to my fears, especially the ones that could stand to cripple me as I attempt to move forward.

A lot of times it involves completely blocking out the fear, ignoring it, and just doing whatever it is I have to do despite it. When I did my little exercise meeting and striking up conversations with strangers (see Identity Transformation: Using Gentle Persuasion to Change Your Beliefs) that’s what I was doing.

I’ve played various sports (basketball, volleyball, softball) for the sole purpose of learning to master my fears. I ended up having a lot of fun and picking up some new skills in the process.

Ultimately, what really happens when I face my fears is that I end up teaching myself a whole new way to be, think, and do. I become a different person.

I change.

Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: changing yourself, changing-beliefs, childhood trauma, Emotional Mastery, Facing Fears, fear of people, fears, handling fear, handling the past, Identity, imaginary fears, Imagination, mastering fear, Transformation

No Comments

Identity Transformation: Using Gentle Persuasion to Change Your Beliefs

July 14th, 2008
· Filed Under: Beliefs · Changing Habits · Facing Fears · Faith · Identity · Imagination · Influence · Phobias · Transformation

I don’t know about you, but the moment I decide that I want to change something in my life, all of my resistance sets in.

Stubborn Dog by Jeff C, http://www.flickr.com/photos/jeffc5000/I had a Sheltie growing up and it always cracked me up whenever I pulled her chain hard to come with me. She would always pull back. We’re talking full-out resistance and totally digging her paws in the ground so as not to budge! 

I remember times I would pull her leash hard on purpose just to watch her do it. It never failed. She would aways fight me!

The best approach was to gently coax her and lightly pull her leash. She would always go where I wanted when I handled her that way!

“As we develop new beliefs about who we are, our behavior will change to support the new identity.”

(Tony Robbins, Awaken the Giant Within, p. 416)

I firmly believe it’s possible to do almost anything I set my mind to. It’s the “setting my mind to” part that’s the most challenging! This requires cooperation and gentle coaxing with myself. The forced approach rarely works.

You see, when I set my mind to doing something new or unfamiliar, I dig my own “paws” in the ground to resist moving forward.

Several years ago I was invited to help facilitate a workshop designed to assist attendees in breaking through the things that held them back. I figured I should probably do my own homework on that subject and decided to spend the day walking around busy areas of town and practice introducing myself to and talking with strangers.

The thought of doing this practically put me in a state of paralysis.

How did I get past that? I began imagining myself meeting people and having a great experience doing it. I began developing a positive picture in my mind of what I was going to do and then I just started doing it.

I had a blast!

So what am I talking about here? My beliefs about who I am and what I can do are malleable rather than fixed. They can change.

Imagination, visualization, meditation, affirmations…these are all methods of gently coaxing my new beliefs forward until they become part of me. New behaviors are sure to follow.

Give it a try!

Email This Post Email This Post
Tags: affirmations, before-and-after, Change, Changing Habits, changing-beliefs, Facing Fears, Faith, Imagination, influencing-yourself, meditation, persuasion, programming the subconscious, Transformation, transforming identity, Visualization

2 Comments

Next Entries →
Want to see more? See older posts here , check out the posts below, or visit our site archives in the sidebar.
  • About
  • Handling Discouragement: Separating Self Worth from Performance
  • Letting Go: Lessons from a Love Ballad
  • Let Go, My Ego…Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow
  • Go Find It!

  • RSS Subscriptions

    • Podcasts Feed
    • Comments RSSComments RSS
    • RSS RSS
    • 0
    • 0
    • 0
    • 0
  • Blogroll

    • Change Your Thoughts
    • Craig Harper - Renovate Your Life
    • Cultivate Greatness
    • Liquidoxology
    • Maximize Your Health & Transform Your Life with Dr. Ben
    • Seth Godin’s Blog
    • Steve Pavlina’s Personal Development Blog
    • Study Matrix Blog - Accelerating Your Learning Potential
    • Talent Development Resources
    • TED Ideas Worth Spreading
  • Archives

    • November 2008
    • October 2008
    • August 2008
    • July 2008
    • June 2008
    • May 2008
    • April 2008

Site powered by BLOG i360 New Media Marketing system™ with optimized WordPress™ engine Skin credits

This blog is protected by Dave's Spam Karma 2: 1167 Spams eaten and counting...

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective owners. Comments are owned by the Poster.
Digging The Well © 2008